Are You....

I wish you could see me
Have you ever really seen me?
No, unfortuneately not.
There’s some sort of barrier, between you and I
As soon as you arrive, I lose my mind
And become this metaphoric blonde
Not a bombshell, but someone,
Whom I’m embarrassed of myself
I wish I could show you me,
I know I’m the one that you’re looking for
If only, you could see me,
I’m someone, I don’t mind,
I don’t think you would either
You describe the perfect one for you
And it’s me, right off the back
But, you send off a signal to my brain
That tells it to go away
To speak w/out thinking
To hit without thinking
To be the one I want to be
I must be intimidated, that’s it
But why? I know, the real me, is for you.
But I wish….
But wishing is for fools and everyone that is made
Stays in the well, is it really me?
Is that you bringing the true me out?
No, nO, NO! It can’t be
I’m not like that….
I’m not you’re stereotypical cheerleader
Who can’t help but flirt w/ everyone,
Cheer for EVRYONE, and be buzzing around,
Talking about nothing, and acting as if they were popular
NO, I’m me, Amanda, not, Moonbeam
With this entirely different side of me,
That just doesn’t like to show through
Am I afraid? Am I so radically different on the inside
That I’m afraid they’ll all come at me with pitchforks
And you’ll never talk to me?
Yes, I am, different
But in that good, mysterious, deep poetic side
Not the energetic, “Look at me! Look at me!”
Causing you to turn your head the other way
I must learn, I tell myself I must learn
It hasn’t happened yet
It will, I just need to get used to your company..
Stay a while…please don’t go…we’ve only just met…